Today started off just fine. We scurried around, got out the door to get Jonathan to school on time...then I came back home to work on my new business (more about that later) until time to run back to school in time to get a good seat for Jonathan's Christmas Program at Mother's Day Out. Keith and MeMe and Pop came for the program, which was great. Jonathan behaved himself on stage, even though he never once opened his mouth to sing. (And I KNOW he knows the songs... he's been singing them around here-sometimes at the top of his lungs-for a month now!) Then, Keith went to run some errands and make hospital visits, Pop ran a Christmas errand, and MeMe and I brought Jonathan home for a much-needed (but not much-wanted) nap.
Now, I know some of you think I should just give up on naptime, since it seems like we fight about it more than we don't. But the problem is that he physically isn't ready to forgo the nap yet. If he does, life is miserable for all of us from about 5pm till he finally gives it up and goes to sleep several hours later. So, in the interest of a happy life for all of us, and my own personal sanity, I still make him nap. Today, that's when it all started going downhill.
He did the customary getting up a few times and getting in trouble, but finally settled down. Pop came home, so MeMe and I decided to let Pop stay home with him while we went Christmas shopping. The plan was for all of us to meet at a favorite restaurant about 5:30, eat dinner, and then to to Zoolight Safari and see the Christmas lights-if it wasn't raining. MeMe and I had a fun time running around for a couple of hours, and got to the restaurant ahead of everyone else. That's when we got the call from Pop. Apparently, Jonathan had been acting the fool since being awakened from his nap at the prescribed time of 4pm. He had just turned over a large (beautiful) torchierre lamp that had been a gift several years prior and broken the large glass globe on it to smitherines.
To make a long story short, MeMe and I ran out of the restaurant and headed home, and Keith turned around as he was heading into the parking lot and headed that way too. Apparently, the broken torchierre lamp was not the only item he tried to destroy. I'm too embarrassed to even go into how horrible he had acted and what all he had done while Pop was the only one here. Let's just suffice it to say that he hit an all-time low in behavior this afternoon, and seemed to think it was funny, according to Pop.
Now, let me clarify. First of all, Keith and I love Jonathan more than we can even express. Because we love him, we tend to be pretty strict on him. Our philosophy is that if we administer proper discipline now and are strict now, hopefully we are laying the groundwork for the rest of his life. Hopefully, by the time he's a teenager we will not be trying to "get a handle' on him and throwing our hands in the air in dismay that he is disobedient and disrespectful. We do not let him "get away" with poor behavior, and probably tend to err on the side of being too strict rather than too lenient. Second, Keith and I love Jonathan and express that love to him constantly in words, affection, and time spent with him. There is a lot of love and laughter in our home on a regular basis.
Tonight, however, there was no laughing. Tonight, Jonathan apparently decided to see if he could outlast us in a battle of the wills. By the time we put him to bed, I was completely emotionally drained. And spiritually dismayed. Seeing how stubborn and disobedient my child is made me realize (once again) my own disobedience and rebellion against God. It's good to realize our own sinfulness...but it is far from pleasant. In realizing our own sinfulness, we realize God's holiness. And in begging God to give wisdom in how to discipline our children with love, we realize how loving and merciful He is to us every minute of every day.
I was in tears as I dried Jonathan's hair tonight. Tears because of my frustration over his choosing defiance over obedience. Tears over my inadequacies as a parent to know how to show him how important it is to choose right from wrong, obedience to authority over selfish pleasures, and to communicate how horrible he was and how much I still love him despite his behavior. More importantly, though, were the tears because the woman I saw in the mirror was (IS) so horribly sinful...stubborn and selfish...miserably wretched...and how much God continually loves me and guides me with his gently, merciful Spirit.
As I put Jonathan to bed, I told him how much I loved him, but how very disappointed I was in him. My voice broke and the tears burned again in my eyes as I laid him in his bed and tucked him in. "Mommy, you sad?" he said quietly, with concern. "Yes, I'm very sad about the way you have behaved tonight." With trembling voice, he replied, "Sorry, Mommy. Don't be sad..." It's what I want to say to God.
Tomorrow is another day...hopefully a better one. Thankfully, because of Christ and His death and resurrection, I can have that hope.
The Rays
PCB trip -September 2011
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Another Minivan In the Car Line
So, I know it's been a long time since my last post... Sorry. life has been a little crazy here. (Plus, our wireless router has had issues...) Anyway, I'm back!
I'm now a full-time stay at home mom, which as been my Dream career for years. It's fantastic! I love it! Even when I'm cleaning toilets, answering "why?" for the 100th time, or listening to whiny-ness, I love it! Jonathan started Mothers Day Out this week. I love that he is at a place I trust-biblically, as well as just caring for his needs and teaching him basic things. His first day, he walked right in to his classroom and started coloring. Even as I walked away with a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes, I was thankful that he had come so far as a little person, and that he wasn't the poor child sobbing underneath the table!
Today, as I drove away, I saw lots of mini-vans in the parking lot and more coming down the street to drop off their precious cargo at MDO, and I had tears I my eyes again. But this time it was for a different reason. This time, it was thankfulness and awe at what God has done in my life. You see, I have dreamed of being a minivan kinda mom for so long, and wondered so many times if it would ever happen. After losing three precious babies before I ever got to hold them, I wondered if I would ever have the joy of children. After working outside the home for so long, I wondered if I would ever have the opportunity to spend my days cleaning house, chasing after my sweet son, and getting dinner on the table most nights. I longed to play at the playground on a weekday morning, be able to have a girls night out without feeling guilty, and, yes, drive around getting groceries in a minivan. Now, before you begin to think this is an endorsement for a car manufacturer, please realize that it's not the vehicle, but what it symbolizes. (Although, I have to say that I do love the convenience and comfort of my
minivan...)
And so, as I look ahead to exciting possibilities God has in our future, I am thankful, oh SO thankful, to be another minivan mom in the car line.
I'm now a full-time stay at home mom, which as been my Dream career for years. It's fantastic! I love it! Even when I'm cleaning toilets, answering "why?" for the 100th time, or listening to whiny-ness, I love it! Jonathan started Mothers Day Out this week. I love that he is at a place I trust-biblically, as well as just caring for his needs and teaching him basic things. His first day, he walked right in to his classroom and started coloring. Even as I walked away with a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes, I was thankful that he had come so far as a little person, and that he wasn't the poor child sobbing underneath the table!
Today, as I drove away, I saw lots of mini-vans in the parking lot and more coming down the street to drop off their precious cargo at MDO, and I had tears I my eyes again. But this time it was for a different reason. This time, it was thankfulness and awe at what God has done in my life. You see, I have dreamed of being a minivan kinda mom for so long, and wondered so many times if it would ever happen. After losing three precious babies before I ever got to hold them, I wondered if I would ever have the joy of children. After working outside the home for so long, I wondered if I would ever have the opportunity to spend my days cleaning house, chasing after my sweet son, and getting dinner on the table most nights. I longed to play at the playground on a weekday morning, be able to have a girls night out without feeling guilty, and, yes, drive around getting groceries in a minivan. Now, before you begin to think this is an endorsement for a car manufacturer, please realize that it's not the vehicle, but what it symbolizes. (Although, I have to say that I do love the convenience and comfort of my
minivan...)
And so, as I look ahead to exciting possibilities God has in our future, I am thankful, oh SO thankful, to be another minivan mom in the car line.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Blessings of a Mud Puddle
I'm sure that those of you who know me well are totally intrigued by the title of this post. I don't like to be dirty. I take two showers a day and NEVER put Jonathan to bed without a bath. I never made mud pies as a child. In fact, I have always hated for my hands to be dirty. But, yesterday I began to feel a just a little differently about dirt.
Now, first of all, you need to understand something about our son, Jonathan. Because of health issues, he couldn't be around other children for his first two years of life. Then, until recently, he simply hasn't had much opportunity to be around other children on a regular basis. Jonathan is not afraid of other children or standoffish with them... he's curious but he usually just observes them and does his own thing instead of actually playing WITH them. Keith and I have had a desire for a long time for Jonathan to have the opportunity to have friends his own age. He's a pretty social little guy, but he's just never really interacted much with other children. Since being at Arbor, he's begun to grow by leaps and bounds in his speech, but also in his socialization skills. Praise!
Ok, back to yesterday. After the Egg Hunt at church, we went to the home of some friends from church. They live on Lake Martin and have 4 children. Their back yard has a huge trampolene and large area that they use for an above-ground pool during the summer, but right now it's just a bare spot of dirt and sand surrounded by keystones. And their water hose stretches all the way to this barren spot of land. Do you see where this is leading?
Yep. Jonathan and their two youngest boys decided to have a little fun on the barren spot with the water hose and a child-size excavator. They dug big holes, filled them up with water, and proceeded to jump in them, splash them on one another, spread mud on one another and basically become three walking, giggling, wet, mud-blobs with legs. My initial reaction of "Oh no! Don't get dirty!" was quickly replaced by joy and thankfulness at watching Jonathan interact with them. He was stomping and splashing and laughing and imitating them like I've never seen him do before. After a while, they decided to turn the water hose on the trampolene and then jump on it after it had a good soaking. Jonathan is not used to unsteady ground, so one jump from Tillman or Macon and Jonathan's little fee would slip right out from under him and he'd fall flat on the trampolene, then just laugh as they bounced him. When jumping would get old, they'd head back to the mud pit. They played out there for hours and I finally had to make him come out of the mud so I could strip him down and bathe him before we could come home!
So, I guess dirt can be a good thing. When it brings such joy to such a cute little boy and provides him a way to begin interacting with other children it's not half bad. In fact, it made me smile and laugh and it made my heart sing with joy. God never ceases to amaze me at what He uses to bless me. Yesterday it was a huge mud puddle and I'm so thankful.
Now, first of all, you need to understand something about our son, Jonathan. Because of health issues, he couldn't be around other children for his first two years of life. Then, until recently, he simply hasn't had much opportunity to be around other children on a regular basis. Jonathan is not afraid of other children or standoffish with them... he's curious but he usually just observes them and does his own thing instead of actually playing WITH them. Keith and I have had a desire for a long time for Jonathan to have the opportunity to have friends his own age. He's a pretty social little guy, but he's just never really interacted much with other children. Since being at Arbor, he's begun to grow by leaps and bounds in his speech, but also in his socialization skills. Praise!
Ok, back to yesterday. After the Egg Hunt at church, we went to the home of some friends from church. They live on Lake Martin and have 4 children. Their back yard has a huge trampolene and large area that they use for an above-ground pool during the summer, but right now it's just a bare spot of dirt and sand surrounded by keystones. And their water hose stretches all the way to this barren spot of land. Do you see where this is leading?
Yep. Jonathan and their two youngest boys decided to have a little fun on the barren spot with the water hose and a child-size excavator. They dug big holes, filled them up with water, and proceeded to jump in them, splash them on one another, spread mud on one another and basically become three walking, giggling, wet, mud-blobs with legs. My initial reaction of "Oh no! Don't get dirty!" was quickly replaced by joy and thankfulness at watching Jonathan interact with them. He was stomping and splashing and laughing and imitating them like I've never seen him do before. After a while, they decided to turn the water hose on the trampolene and then jump on it after it had a good soaking. Jonathan is not used to unsteady ground, so one jump from Tillman or Macon and Jonathan's little fee would slip right out from under him and he'd fall flat on the trampolene, then just laugh as they bounced him. When jumping would get old, they'd head back to the mud pit. They played out there for hours and I finally had to make him come out of the mud so I could strip him down and bathe him before we could come home!
So, I guess dirt can be a good thing. When it brings such joy to such a cute little boy and provides him a way to begin interacting with other children it's not half bad. In fact, it made me smile and laugh and it made my heart sing with joy. God never ceases to amaze me at what He uses to bless me. Yesterday it was a huge mud puddle and I'm so thankful.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Adjusting
I know it's been a while since I last posted. Honestly, life has been so busy that I've just not had time to sit down at the computer. So much has been going on!
Jonathan has started talking in sentences. I'm not always sure what the entire sentence is, but he's putting words together now, which is huge! He babble/talks constantly now, which is great. His speech therapist did some further testing last week and this week we should get a new plan of attack to overcome his apraxia.
Keith moved into the office at Arbor Baptist and is so excited to (for the first time ever) be able to have all of his books out where he can see them all at once. Our shelf space at home was limited, so he only had the most important, most used books unpacked and everything else was in boxes in the storage closet. Now, he's surrounded by them! I'm looking forward to "decorating" the one wall without shelves, and putting a tiny bit of my touch in his office. (I'm not sure why that's important, but it just is!) Things are going well at the church. We truly love it at Arbor! The people are so kind and loving, and we are so excited to see what God will do in the days to come. So many have expressed a desire to see the "fire from Heaven" and that is what we pray for... that God would just push us out of the way and allow us to see Him work in a might way, whatever that may be.
With Keith being the pastor, we have had major schedule changes here at home. Sundays are great, but long right now. Because the commute is about 40 minutes to the church, we pack up the van on Saturday evening and just camp out at the church all day on Sunday. I was amazed that Jonathan actually took about a 2-hour nap there- but thankful! I actually enjoyed the quiet time to think and pray and crochet. At home, I feel like I have to take advantage of every minute to clean something or cook something or do some laundry or one of the other endless tasks of life. At church, there's none of that... just quiet, which is good. The rest of the week has been very full, too. Jonathan has adjusted better than I thought, though I can tell he's really missing his time with Daddy and is more clingy to me when I'm around. He loves spending time with MeMe and Pop on Mondays and Bessie on Tuesdays and Thursdays... but his routine is different and will take some adjusting to. Still, I am SO thankful that we have such wonderful caretakers for him and that we are able to keep him at home.
I turned in my resignation letter at work Monday, and was oddly a little emotional about it. I've been at the same company for 14 1/2 years now and seen it grow and change a LOT over the years. I'm thankful to have worked with such great people for so long and it will seem odd (for a few days) to not be there. For so long now I have ached for the day that I could retire and be at home. I am so thankful to have that opportunity now! I'm counting down the days till June 30 when that will become a reality!
We are in the process of shopping for health insurance. I was excited about Individual Blue for a while, until I read about their 365-day waiting period for any condition or symptom you've been diagnosed with, treated for, etc in the past 2 years, even if you've had prior coverage with no lapse. -And there's no maternity coverage whatsoever for 365 days. Basically, they just want to collect premiums on people they won't have to fork out any money on. (Yes, I am a little bitter about it!) So, I've got to pour over the SBC options and search the web this weekend to see what else is available. It just shouldn't be so expensive to be insured when you don't work for a large company.
So, we're adjusting. Life is good, but not easy right now. We knew it wouldn't be until everything was settled with our transition. It's ok though. God has it all under control, even when I feel like hyperventilating, and He can handle it! There's a light at the end of the tunnel. We have a wonderful church home. Keith's joy in finally doing what God has gifted and called him to do delights me. Jonathan's clingy-ness equals lots of hugs for me. God is good ALL the time!
Jonathan has started talking in sentences. I'm not always sure what the entire sentence is, but he's putting words together now, which is huge! He babble/talks constantly now, which is great. His speech therapist did some further testing last week and this week we should get a new plan of attack to overcome his apraxia.
Keith moved into the office at Arbor Baptist and is so excited to (for the first time ever) be able to have all of his books out where he can see them all at once. Our shelf space at home was limited, so he only had the most important, most used books unpacked and everything else was in boxes in the storage closet. Now, he's surrounded by them! I'm looking forward to "decorating" the one wall without shelves, and putting a tiny bit of my touch in his office. (I'm not sure why that's important, but it just is!) Things are going well at the church. We truly love it at Arbor! The people are so kind and loving, and we are so excited to see what God will do in the days to come. So many have expressed a desire to see the "fire from Heaven" and that is what we pray for... that God would just push us out of the way and allow us to see Him work in a might way, whatever that may be.
With Keith being the pastor, we have had major schedule changes here at home. Sundays are great, but long right now. Because the commute is about 40 minutes to the church, we pack up the van on Saturday evening and just camp out at the church all day on Sunday. I was amazed that Jonathan actually took about a 2-hour nap there- but thankful! I actually enjoyed the quiet time to think and pray and crochet. At home, I feel like I have to take advantage of every minute to clean something or cook something or do some laundry or one of the other endless tasks of life. At church, there's none of that... just quiet, which is good. The rest of the week has been very full, too. Jonathan has adjusted better than I thought, though I can tell he's really missing his time with Daddy and is more clingy to me when I'm around. He loves spending time with MeMe and Pop on Mondays and Bessie on Tuesdays and Thursdays... but his routine is different and will take some adjusting to. Still, I am SO thankful that we have such wonderful caretakers for him and that we are able to keep him at home.
I turned in my resignation letter at work Monday, and was oddly a little emotional about it. I've been at the same company for 14 1/2 years now and seen it grow and change a LOT over the years. I'm thankful to have worked with such great people for so long and it will seem odd (for a few days) to not be there. For so long now I have ached for the day that I could retire and be at home. I am so thankful to have that opportunity now! I'm counting down the days till June 30 when that will become a reality!
We are in the process of shopping for health insurance. I was excited about Individual Blue for a while, until I read about their 365-day waiting period for any condition or symptom you've been diagnosed with, treated for, etc in the past 2 years, even if you've had prior coverage with no lapse. -And there's no maternity coverage whatsoever for 365 days. Basically, they just want to collect premiums on people they won't have to fork out any money on. (Yes, I am a little bitter about it!) So, I've got to pour over the SBC options and search the web this weekend to see what else is available. It just shouldn't be so expensive to be insured when you don't work for a large company.
So, we're adjusting. Life is good, but not easy right now. We knew it wouldn't be until everything was settled with our transition. It's ok though. God has it all under control, even when I feel like hyperventilating, and He can handle it! There's a light at the end of the tunnel. We have a wonderful church home. Keith's joy in finally doing what God has gifted and called him to do delights me. Jonathan's clingy-ness equals lots of hugs for me. God is good ALL the time!
Sunday, March 13, 2011
"It's either the beginning or the end."
This weekend has been monumental in the life of the Rays. Last night we shared a covered-dish meal with the folks at Arbor Baptist Church and then had a Q&A where we told them our stories and invited them to ask any questions they wanted to about us. The food was unbelievable, and in great abundance!
This morning, Keith preached on Psalm 23. We all think we know this passage, but there is so much more there than we can even imagine! I'm not sure I've ever heard him preach like that. God's word opened and explained brought tears to my eyes and made me breathless at times. I am so thankful to know the Good Shepherd... so thankful that He not only cares for me but calls me His! I was also blessed by having Jonathan in worship with us this morning. The children come in for the beginning of the service and leave for Children's Worship after the Children's Moment. This was his first time in "big church" and he did a really great job! I loved watching him sit, spellbound, as he listed to the music. And I cried when he walked right up to Bro. Norris during the message and nodded to all that he was saying about God's love for us, pointed to himself when asked "Who wants to pray this morning." Oh what a blessing!
After the service, the three of us went back to the office to await the results of the church vote. As we sat down, Keith looked at me and said, "Well, this is either the beginning or the end." Thankfully, it is the beginning! Arbor voted to call Keith as their pastor! We are so humbled, excited, thankful, overjoyed... there aren't word to describe how we feel right now! Keith will spend this week moving into and setting up his office. We felt it best to allow their Interim Pastor the chance to have his last moment with them without us there this evening, but we will be there as pastor and family beginning next Sunday. This is a blessing beyond our imagination. I just want to laugh and cry all at once! Thank-you Lord!
This morning, Keith preached on Psalm 23. We all think we know this passage, but there is so much more there than we can even imagine! I'm not sure I've ever heard him preach like that. God's word opened and explained brought tears to my eyes and made me breathless at times. I am so thankful to know the Good Shepherd... so thankful that He not only cares for me but calls me His! I was also blessed by having Jonathan in worship with us this morning. The children come in for the beginning of the service and leave for Children's Worship after the Children's Moment. This was his first time in "big church" and he did a really great job! I loved watching him sit, spellbound, as he listed to the music. And I cried when he walked right up to Bro. Norris during the message and nodded to all that he was saying about God's love for us, pointed to himself when asked "Who wants to pray this morning." Oh what a blessing!
After the service, the three of us went back to the office to await the results of the church vote. As we sat down, Keith looked at me and said, "Well, this is either the beginning or the end." Thankfully, it is the beginning! Arbor voted to call Keith as their pastor! We are so humbled, excited, thankful, overjoyed... there aren't word to describe how we feel right now! Keith will spend this week moving into and setting up his office. We felt it best to allow their Interim Pastor the chance to have his last moment with them without us there this evening, but we will be there as pastor and family beginning next Sunday. This is a blessing beyond our imagination. I just want to laugh and cry all at once! Thank-you Lord!
Friday, March 11, 2011
When It Rains, It Pours
This week, that statement has been soooo true in Birmingham, AL. It rained ALL night and ALL day the following day on Tuesday. There are still literally rivers of water running down our driveway to prove it!
This year, that statement has been very true in the life of our family. The biggest downpour has been in our family's future. At the end of last summer, Keith sent resumes to churches and associations in every state in the southeast. We began to hear from some almost immediately, but then it came to a screeching halt over the holidays. Once January hit, we began to hear from several churches a week, it seemed like, that wanted to know if they could check his references or get a DVD or wanted to meet with us. That has all been such an encouragement. The really exciting part is that this Sunday, a church will vote on bringing Keith as their pastor! We are so excited! After meeting with the search committee about a month ago, Keith preached morning and evening services there last week. Tomorrow night, we will share a covered dish meal with them and then they will get to ask us questions to get to know us better. Sunday, Keith will preach the morning service and then the congregation will vote.
This is huge for our family! It means that Keith will finally be able to do what God has gifted and called him to do. It means that we will finally feel like we have a real church home for the first time in a long time. It will also allow me to quit work in a few months and be a stay-at-home Mommy--my lifelong career goal! Keith and I have felt for a long time that we are in the "wrong" role. He has been the stay-at-home-Dad, while I went to the office and worked all day. This is not what we wanted, but was necessary because of insurance concerns and Jonathan's health. It will be such a blessing to be able to be home with Jonathan during the day and do the things I feel like I'm called to do. I know a lot of women abhor the June Cleaver model of wife and mother, but I can't wait!
God continues to rain down blessings. I told Keith last Sunday afternoon that I guess I've been underestimating God. I kind of figured that, when we were called to a church, it would be smaller than we're comfortable in, with a mostly non-existent music and children's ministry, etc, etc. This church is "exceedingly, abundantly more" than I even imagined. When I saw all the children, and learned that they are diligent to teach even the younger ones about the Gospel...when I heard the choir sing and the pianist play... when I saw how usable the facilities are... when experienced how friendly and genuine the people are... my reaction was, "Seriously, God?!? You would give us all that as a bonus?"
There have been other showers of blessings this year. Jonathan turned 3! This is totally amazing, considering how little and premature he was when he came into the world. He continues to be a blessing to us. -And he's recently made great progress with his speech. We still have a long way to go, but the progress is so encouraging.
We've also decided to adopt. We've always wanted more children and still pray that God will bless us with another biological child. But, not long after the earthquake last year in Haiti, God began to work on our hearts about adopting internationally. We've talked and prayed about it for almost a year, and finally talked to a local adoption agency to get some questions answered. We feel that one way God wants to further the Gospel is to increase our family with hopefully two children from Haiti. It will be a long, faith-filled journey, but we are so excited to begin it once things are settled with being at a church.
There are other blessings along the way... too many to count. Usually, we think of all the bad stuff that happens when we say "When it rains, it pours," but sometimes it is how God pours out His blessings on us... in showers that just keep coming, leaving us refreshed and encouraged.
This year, that statement has been very true in the life of our family. The biggest downpour has been in our family's future. At the end of last summer, Keith sent resumes to churches and associations in every state in the southeast. We began to hear from some almost immediately, but then it came to a screeching halt over the holidays. Once January hit, we began to hear from several churches a week, it seemed like, that wanted to know if they could check his references or get a DVD or wanted to meet with us. That has all been such an encouragement. The really exciting part is that this Sunday, a church will vote on bringing Keith as their pastor! We are so excited! After meeting with the search committee about a month ago, Keith preached morning and evening services there last week. Tomorrow night, we will share a covered dish meal with them and then they will get to ask us questions to get to know us better. Sunday, Keith will preach the morning service and then the congregation will vote.
This is huge for our family! It means that Keith will finally be able to do what God has gifted and called him to do. It means that we will finally feel like we have a real church home for the first time in a long time. It will also allow me to quit work in a few months and be a stay-at-home Mommy--my lifelong career goal! Keith and I have felt for a long time that we are in the "wrong" role. He has been the stay-at-home-Dad, while I went to the office and worked all day. This is not what we wanted, but was necessary because of insurance concerns and Jonathan's health. It will be such a blessing to be able to be home with Jonathan during the day and do the things I feel like I'm called to do. I know a lot of women abhor the June Cleaver model of wife and mother, but I can't wait!
God continues to rain down blessings. I told Keith last Sunday afternoon that I guess I've been underestimating God. I kind of figured that, when we were called to a church, it would be smaller than we're comfortable in, with a mostly non-existent music and children's ministry, etc, etc. This church is "exceedingly, abundantly more" than I even imagined. When I saw all the children, and learned that they are diligent to teach even the younger ones about the Gospel...when I heard the choir sing and the pianist play... when I saw how usable the facilities are... when experienced how friendly and genuine the people are... my reaction was, "Seriously, God?!? You would give us all that as a bonus?"
There have been other showers of blessings this year. Jonathan turned 3! This is totally amazing, considering how little and premature he was when he came into the world. He continues to be a blessing to us. -And he's recently made great progress with his speech. We still have a long way to go, but the progress is so encouraging.
We've also decided to adopt. We've always wanted more children and still pray that God will bless us with another biological child. But, not long after the earthquake last year in Haiti, God began to work on our hearts about adopting internationally. We've talked and prayed about it for almost a year, and finally talked to a local adoption agency to get some questions answered. We feel that one way God wants to further the Gospel is to increase our family with hopefully two children from Haiti. It will be a long, faith-filled journey, but we are so excited to begin it once things are settled with being at a church.
There are other blessings along the way... too many to count. Usually, we think of all the bad stuff that happens when we say "When it rains, it pours," but sometimes it is how God pours out His blessings on us... in showers that just keep coming, leaving us refreshed and encouraged.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Romans 8:26-27 Lived Out
"And the Holy Spirit helps us in our distress. For we don't even know what we should pray for, nor how we should pray. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying..."Every night, before Jonathan goes to bed, Keith and I read a few verses of Scripture with him from his "God Promises" book and pray with him. There are several special people in his life that we pray for every night by name. If we leave someone out, he will remind us once we say "Amen" and we will have to stop and pray for that person. On Christmas Eve, he began praying by repeating the names of people Keith uttered prayer for. Now, when it's time to pray before a meal or especially at night he quickly says "I-me!" and points to himself, meaning HE wants to pray.
Now you have to remember that A) he is not even 3 years old yet, and B) he has a huge speech delay and has only recently begun saying meaningful sounds and forming words. It is a beautiful thing for us to hear him say any word... but to hear him talk to God is the most amazing blessing! When he prays, he squeezes his eyes shut and buries his head in our arms. He speaks quietly and his little voice takes on a whole different sound. He makes little sighs and grunts and murmurs that we cannot understand, and then will occasionally say the name of a loved one very quietly. When he's done, he'll raise his head and say "A" or "Meh" for amen. When we open our eyes, he's grinning from ear to ear and looking at us expectantly.
Most nights, it brings tears of joy and gratitude to my eyes. Each night, I think of Romans 8:26...we don't know what we should pray for or how we should pray...the Holy Spirit prays for us with moanings and groanings that cannot be expressed in words...and the Father that knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying. Listening to Jonathan pray illustrates these verses to me. He doesn't know how to pray... He cannot always express himself in words so he just sighs and grunts and murmurs as he prays, just like the Spirit intercedes for us when we have no words...and I believe our Heavenly Father knows exactly what that sweet 2-year-old is saying.
Tonight, his prayer was something like this (translation in parenthesis.) "Ah (God)....unh...sigh...I-ya (Daddy)...hmmm...Ma-ma...sigh...hmmm...Meh (Miss Mel)...smack...uh...Me-Me (Keith's mom-MeMe)...A! (Amen!) It is humbling to hear your 2-year-old pray for you by name, but even more humbling to think that the Holy Spirit prays for us by name all the time.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)